As Homecoming has started to approach, I’ve overheard people around school mention: “I’m not going ‘cause I don’t have a date.” I know we see the cute or cringe-worthy homecoming proposals on Twitter at least twice a week this time of year, but I’m sick of girls and guys getting discouraged from having a fun time just because no one has asked them out. If it really bothers you that much, ask them yourself, but be cautious if you really like this person. Dances aren’t really an ideal first date, and there are plenty of opportunities for things to go wrong.

Since I have the opportunity, let me remind you that whomever might take you to homecoming probably won’t be the love-of-your-life forever and ever. That means at some point the relationship you had with that person will end, and if it ends foully, it’s likely that every moment you spent with them will become a foul memory. Besides, even if it’s just a casual date for homecoming, there are so many more opportunities for your night to be ruined with a date than with friends. Just think of Hermione Granger’s Yule Ball or literally any movie where one half of the pair throws up.

Then there’s the whole slow-dance thing. At Allen’s dances, you’ll maybe get one or two slow songs. I guess that could be good or bad depending on who your date is. If it’s your girlfriend/boyfriend, maybe it’d be a bit disappointing, but if you’re just with the guy or gal from first period as a pity date, good luck. On the other hand, if you’re there with your awkward date, are you really going to be wanting to do the Wobble with them and not your friends? Personally, I’d pass.

Honestly, being at a dance with a date really limits your options. If they want to dance and you don’t, you’re going to be embarrassed. If you want to dance and they don’t, you’ll feel guilty for wanting to ditch them. Friends will forgive you if you want to circle the room to find other people to mingle and dance with, but if you’re with a date, you’re pretty much stuck with the same person the entire time. For better or worse. Why would you want to make a commitment to someone you might not even care for for a whole evening?

Of course, not all dances with dates are terrible, and if you truly are “just friends,” you’ll likely have a great time, but that’s the whole point. Then really, you’re just going with a friend. When it comes to the awkward date situation, though, there’s lots of room for miscommunication. Did he/she just ask me to the dance or to be their boyfriend/girlfriend? Did he/she really say yes, or did he/she do it just because I asked him/her in front of a giant group of people with a lit-up banner? Needless to say, if you really like someone, don’t look at a dance to be your chance to finally ask them out.